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  • Writer's pictureStephen Williams

Book a Win (no matter how small) in Child Custody

Book a win, no matter how small. Make your bed. Clean off the dining room table. Actually spend 20 seconds washing your hands like the Mayo clinic says. Take the stairs rather than the elevator. #ChildCustody and high conflict #CoParenting is a marathon, not a sprint, or hundreds of tiny battles rather than one big war to win or lose.


Wins build momentum. Wins release positive chemicals in your brain and body. Here are some rules for small wins:

(1) pick a battle or challenge small enough to complete in a day, e.g., returning an overdue library book or, more germaine to Child Custody, be 15 minutes early for the custody or visitation exchange.

(2) pick something you have complete control over. There’s plenty that’s completely out of our control. The Other Side, the Judge and those Social Workers are grown ups making their own decisions and going about their day how they see fit. You can’t control whether the Other Side is 15 minutes late to the exchange, but you can be there on time. Virtue is its own reward. Book the win.

(3) Make sure the small win is aligned with your values and long term goals. Making the bed each morning aligns with having a tidy household which aligns with a feeling of peace, steady energy and clear thinking.


These wins stack up, man, no kidding. Og Mandino, (yeah that’s his name), wrote that preventing failure is more important than gaining success; Warren Buffet says the first rule of investing is don’t lose money…


Point is, so many of our clients and prospective clients come in swinging for the fences, and that’s GREAT! We need a LONG-term goal that motivates us to take action. But, book the small wins and build the foundation, or infrastructure for slow, steady INFINITE progress in your case and your relationships.


If you would like to learn more about how you, as a Committed Parent or Caring Relative, can stand up for yourself and be more effective in your Child Custody case, please visit to schedule your initial consultation at one of our offices.


This article contains general information and should not be construed as legal advice for you and or your unique situation. ~SW, Foxtrot

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