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The Hidden Pitfalls of Child Custody and Visitation during the Christmas Season: Part 3


Christmas and the Holidays are extra special in Child Custody, Visitation, Divorce and DHR cases. Maybe we get a little extra time with our kids, but the other side of that coin is that the Other Side gets a little extra time, too, and that means extra time for you WITHOUT your kids.


You miss them. You worry about them. You know that each time you check in on them you’re risking an argument with the Other Side for allegedly imposing on their time.


As always, a little planning and a little perspective can help us get through the cold days and lonely nights without our kids.


1. Treat Yourself

Ask yourself, what’s one thing you enjoy and that you don’t get to do when you have the kids; thinking out loud here…

[ ] Read a book?

[ ] Drink an extra glass of wine… or two?

[ ] Watch an action or romance move that might not be appropriate to watch around the kids?

[ ] Get out of the house and hit up a happy hour?

[ ] work on something around the house that you haven’t been able to make a priority?

[ ] catch up on work?

[ ] take a deep breath??

[ ] sit there and do absolutely nothing????


Once, you’ve identified something you’d like to do. Take a moment to be grateful for the time and space to consider it, look forward to it and do it. (Planning something fun and looking forward to something fun is a big part of the joy so don’t miss out!)


(* pro move: if you dare, even take a moment to be grateful to the Other Side for taking care of the kids for a bit; harder to be mad, feel anger or resentment when you’re feeling gratitude)


2. Plan your check-ins

Again, planning and looking forward to something is half the fun! Yeah, you miss your kids, but your Custody Order or Visitation Order, if it’s worth a damn, probably provides for communication with your kids while they’re with the Other Side and SHOULD provide for specific times to do it, either every other evening or so (preferable) or maybe even every evening (excessive, imo). With a plan and schedule in place, you’re less likely to bother the Other Side (not that you care but that means it’s less likely to start an argument).


3. Make a decision … and do something about it

‘Cause if you don’t do anything about it, have you really made the decision?


Whether it’s a DHR case or a more traditional Child Custody, Visitation or Divorce case, your children may not be getting the time with you that they deserve. The pain, sadness or loneliness you’re feeling, and the knowledge that they might be feeling it, too, can be the motivation for you to finally DECIDE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.


It’s Christmas, and it’s about to be a new year. Let this be the last Christmas you sit around without your kids any more than you have to. BOOK AN INITIAL MEETING with our team and quit fucking around when it comes to your kids and your family, especially at Christmas.

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If you would like to learn more about how you, as a Committed Parent or Caring Relative, can stand up for yourself and be more effective in your Child Custody, Divorce, DHR or Adoption case, will you CLICK HERE to schedule your initial consultation at one of our offices?

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This article contains general information and should not be construed as legal advice for you and or your unique situation. ~SW, Foxtrot


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