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  • Writer's pictureStephen Williams

What’s Your State of the Union in Child Custody?

He shall from time to time give to the Congress Information of the State of the Union, and recommend to their Consideration such Measures as he shall judge necessary and expedient. U.S.C.A. Const. Art. II § 3

Today, the President of the United States will deliver the #StateoftheUnion address and, don’t get me wrong, it will be worth a listen and it’s important to be civically engaged, but what will affect your life demonstrably and immeasurably more than what anyone in Washington, D.C., does or says is whether you take an opportunity to take a cold, hard but nonetheless nonjudgmental look at your situation, #ChildCustody-wise, family-wise, work-wise, or otherwise.

Ray Dalio, in his book Principles, instructs readers to ask “(1) what do I want? (2) what’s true? and (3) what should you do to achieve #1 in light of #2?” The second question is your miniature State of the Union and it’s a lot harder than it sounds. Sometimes we have “blind spots” to our own failings. That’s why it’s so important to surround yourself with people who will challenge you and be honest with you. That’s why we’ve built our team at Foxtrot Family Law the way we have. That doesn’t mean someone else is necessarily right, if that’s even a thing, it just means we should be open to others’ input and weigh that against our own perceptions and values when making decisions and going about our day and our work.

Imagine someone “calling you out” for something. What’s your typical reaction? Get defensive and counterattack? Cower and refuse to hear or expose yourself to anything that doesn’t jibe with what you wish were true as opposed to what is true?

Or, to yourself or even out loud and upon hearing something that challenges what you have always thought and always done and hasn’t gotten you and your family and your children where you want it all to be, can you say, “Hmm…that’s true.” If you can, and then you can make choices and take actions from that place of operative truth, your progress and learning curve will be unstoppable.


This article contains general information and should not be construed as legal advice for you and or your unique situation. If you would like to speak more about how you, as a Committed Parent or Caring Relative, can be more effective in your Child Custody case, please visit to schedule your initial consultation at one of our offices. ~SW, Foxtrot

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